Beware the ides of April

Next week I seem to have agreed to see I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, The Long Blondes, Portishead (twice), James and Bjork. And still do a full week's work.

Sour Times

Here's the HMV online blurb for the new Portishead single. Can you spot the deliberate mistake? Hint, it's the bit about them having broken up.

"In the mid-1990s, the dreamy-but-grooving sound of trip-hop was confined to the U.K. underground until Portishead brought it to the worldwide mainstream. Combining electronics, lush production, Ennio Morricone-like guitar breaks, and angelic singing from frontwoman Beth Gibbons, the band became a leader of the trip-hop movement. Portishead split after its second album, and Gibbons eventually went the solo route with her critically lauded 2002 album OUT OF SEASON."

Incidentally, is it me, or is the new album a bit of a let down?

White Diamond

I've finally watched the Kylie "White Diamond" documentary and had forgotten that I can be seen three or four times. I'm never going to a filmed gig again.

The ultra observant may also have seen my cameo in the Earl's Court broadcast of the original Showgirl show. Still better than Gemma's appearance in the KT Tunstall Glastonbury video that showed up on one of her DVD singles.

Seetickets, these are my two friends - Logic and Common Sense. I don't believe you've met.

I have just had an email from our Nottingham based friends at Seetickets asking me to return a ticket for a cancelled event in order that they might process my refund. They've also suggested I use a secure service.

Anyone spot the flaw in their logic yet? I think they will when they get my reply...

The Great Outdoors

So I'm going to V Festival. Well, one day of it to be precise. Interestingly, it's almost exactly the kind of line-up I'd expected from Glastonbury. Given that I'll get to (with any luck) see Alanis, Duffy, Muse and Amy Macdonald, that pretty much accounts for the ticket price.

But answer me this - why the hell are The Verve (who had the sum total of three songs that anyone can hum - and one of those was by the Rolling Stones) headlining at least three major festivals this year? It could only be worse if it was Maroon bloody Five.

Island

So, in November I'm off on holiday to Miami, St. Thomas, St. Kitts, Barbados, Dominica and Antigua over the course of a couple of weeks. Finally going to get the chance to try scuba diving and hopefully get away from it all completely. It's going to be a long eight months.

Secrets and Lies

I'm considering taking a more anarchic approach to the internet in general, and particularly Web 2.0. Surely this is something we can have more fun with. We don't have to tell the truth in our Facebook status, and better yet, you can really mess with people who you don't actually see very often in real life. So if you say "... is going to Brazil for three months" ..."is in a Helicopter" they have no reason to doubt you...

Similarly, for those who you DO see a lot, particularly work colleagues, I'd go for something like changing your status late at night to "... is in Bournemouth" if you work in Manchester then turning up on time the following morning and remarking on just how tired you are. Just to see if anyone asks.

And why should we tag our Flickr photos truthfully for the indexing? Let's tag everything as "Fluffy Kitten" (that goes for ALT tags on web pages - I know it's not really cricket for people with screen readers, but they'll end up thinking the internet's a nicer place than it actually is, so everyone wins, no?) or just tag them as something at random. Conversely, all pictures of your cat should be tagged with historical figures. It'll give someone using Google Images something to think about when they search for picture of Brezhnev and get a picture of your cat.

I'll get us started, shall I?



I think I really ought to go to bed now, no?